‘Pavement/ Cigarettes butts on the beach’, photo on canvas by Alicia Bee, May 2011, exhibited as part of the Shabana Jacobson Studio Gallery Fundraiser Auction on Saturday 21 May 2011.

PUBLIC SPEECH – BEING AN EXHIBITIONIST

I had a paranoid vision that it could very well flood this Sunday 22 May when I open my photography exhibition as it had when BATHERS ON THE BEACH was launched late October.  The weather could again make a statement on my important date, and perhaps it could rain everytime I launched something.

That pattern could be a joke in a speech later should I need to rely on an old formula.

Like others I once thought the Crowded House song ‘Weather with you’ was about me, as it rained when I went to the beach a lot. But we don’t need to play that song again. Though I did not ‘cause the Queensland floods, it did rain last time I went there AND I was planning a holiday there in January when the big waters began.

In Hawaii I thought under another sunshower that perhaps all great beach destinations know when a writer hits the sand and it changes its poetry and color. The waves dull, and sometimes the most tropical of all desert islands become a rainforest feeder while it replenishes with the gifts of the gods.

It is Autumn in Melbourne, and it is again my birthday. Perhaps we all just need our own FAMOUS BLUE RAINCOAT (Leonard Cohen song), see PARADE – MALE FASHION.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G2NHp3wLQYo&NR=1

Let’s see what the skies will give us, then we can all judge my launch luck. Either way, it will be the same weather it is given to other events on Sunday including outdoor football matches. Always be thankful for the roof you have over your head, and wear a hat out; or a raincoat that has one in the pocket at the base of your neck.

Flowing with these ideas I have been begging everyone to come, stating that no-one was coming and it has been looking so pathetic some friends have asked me to pull back a bit to act professional.

Another of my ‘anti-publicity’ tricks has been to describe the exhibition in simple terms rather than make it seem like an over-hyped art event that doesn’t stand up to its expectations.

“I just want you to know that they are all grey photos of rocks, the whole exhibition is just one color, I don’t want you to be disappointed and go there or ‘rock-up’ and look at it and go ‘I can do that!’ or think its boring, I mean it is all grey, and that’s just what I am doing,” I have explained near twenty times. Truthfully the exhibition is photos of rocks with grey, white, brown and even shades close to black.

Also I have been going over the new jokes related to having an art exhibition and come up with;

1. The fact I will now officially be an ‘exhibitionist’, 2. You could term the artist as ‘well hung’ or other ratings for that description.

Let me know of other art jokes or those related to having an exhibition.

I remembered Yoko Ono had a message that related to her own fears of people not coming to her exhibition in 2008, and went searching for it in the messages that came from her Facebook fan page. It was saved in my inbox archives because I had wanted to keep it for some purpose to remind me that it was okay to feel nerves close to important events,  and it was planned to simply to use her words somehow in a newsletter about an event that I wanted to plug. You can see from her words that even though she is a known artist Yoko Ono had also suffered nervousness before her shows even these days.

On April 18 2008 Yoko Ono wrote;

“LeLong Gallery asked me to do a show. I immediately liked Mary Sabatino, who requested it. So I said yes. My mind was inspired as I checked out the space, and quickly envisioned the rooms with old works and new. Everything went very smoothly. But then, around the opening day, I suddenly realized that I had not done a one woman artshow in N.Y. for about 4 years. And it’s New York. Somehow, that combination made me feel a bit nervous. It made me nervous, too, that it was possible that nobody would be coming.

Well, that’s my fault. When I do a show, I keep saying ‘no, you don’t have to come’ to friends who ask if they should or not. I always do that, even with concerts. ‘No, don’t come. You really don’t have to’. I discourage them so emphatically, they probably think it would be rude to come… I don’t know why I do that. I’m extra nervous before the shows. But if the show was good, I always feel a bit sad that my friends weren’t there!”

Trivia: I think it is merely coincidental that the gallery owner of Studio 7A is also a Sabatino but note it now I’m rereading it and think it’s still funny that I saved this blurb for 3 years for this event! I thank Steven Sabatino for offering to let me use the space for a one person show, which is proudly my first exhibition and would love to have you all there.

PLACEMENT: SHABANA JACOBSON STUDIO GALLERY FUNDRAISER.

One of my pieces from the Grey Hair photography exhibition is in a fundraiser auction on Saturday 21 May. It is viewable at the gallery at 120 Alexandra Parade on Friday 20 May and all day before the auction starts at 7pm. Shabana Jacobson’s Studio Gallery had its large front window broken by a man’s hand recently, and the fundraiser helps to correct the hole left in the budget. Visit gallery website www.sjsgallery.com

PHOTOGRAPHY & POPULAR MUSIC

The GREY HAIR photography exhibition launch features the combination of both ‘rock photography’ and live music performance as THE TAYLOR PROJECT + MERRY PRAIN + BRETT DELLAVEDOVA + FIONA LEE MAYNARD (pictured) + MELISSA MAIN sing LEONARD COHEN songs as the TEA & ORANGES BAND in keeping with my usual birthday party tribute night.

This time I have allowed all acts to entreat the audience to playing some of their own tracks and have chosen to showcase less people in the lineup. The exhibition will be using tea and oranges as theme and offers a ‘tea party’ with tea, cakes, biscuits and oranges.

POST – PJ HARVEY SHEELA-NA -GIG

In the year 2000, I played this song from the 1992 PJ Harvey album so much it makes me giggle to remember the days.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AF3H-cG-sk4

 Armani Navy Hooded Polyester Raincoat Jacket.

Balenciaga Mens Blue Zipper Down Slim Fit Trench Coat.

PARADE – MENS FAMOUS BLUE RAINCOATS

Its approaching winter in Melbourne and you can bet your soggy bottom that it’s gonna rain sometime, and you’ll need to cover yourself.  Take a look at these two examples of FAMOUS BLUE RAINCOATS, and decide which one you would wear if you could.

This Balenciaga Mens Blue Zipper Down the front Slim Fit Trench Coat normally retails at a European airfare price of $1,410.00.  On Niftyfits online website you can buy it for an amazing $840.

A cheaper label Armani offers this Mens Navy Hooded Polyester Raincoat Jacket at $400; marking it down from the retail $540. You can see it only cost the price of a Northern Hemisphere getaway to keep you protected from the wet weather.

POETASTER

Rupert Bunny Mansion

Alicia Bee 2010 ©

I’m a mused by music in the Rupert Bunny Mansion,

We’re spinning round the floor in art circles dizzy motion,

There’s a lot of paintings of ladies with hair golden red,

Multiple red roses grace swans swimming near the ocean,

Pauper musicians copy speech scribbled inspired notion,

I’m a mused by music in the Rupert Bunny Mansion.

Prophetic voice nymphs scent their necks with flower love potion,

Days and nights in August a woman listens to music,

The Belle Epoque of Paris Frill will drink the wine till dead,

We’ll live here in this new house like the Heide extension,

There is so much other poetry I have not yet read,

Melbourne is our birthplace fashion France another nation,

We’re spinning round the floor in art circles dizzy motion.

My red hair the cause of many artist fascination,

Reclining on grass, nature is a Bunny model bed,

We’re spinning round the floor in art circles dizzy motion,

I’m a mused by music in the Rupert Bunny Mansion.

THANKS FOR READING. I LOVE YOU LIKE AN EXHIBITIONIST.

END. Alicia Bee © 2011.

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