‘Rotten Apple (The last 2010 Apple)’ Unnumbered, 17 December 2010, Brunswick, Photo by Alicia Bee © 2010.

‘Rotten Apple (The last 2011 Apple)’ Unnumbered, February 2011, Brunswick, Photo by Alicia Bee © 2011.


The time lapse photography apple (PATENT) has been on my desk next to my computer for the past year since the hobby project started.

Though I stopped taking photos of that apple somewhere after the Castlemaine Dogs In Space special; and my hard drive really got too full of countless photos of apples, bands, and flowers.

The state of the apple hasn’t changed much since early February 2011 from when the project started last November, but it remained there on my desk anyway, reminding me that the rotting process of the dead can be swift but the drying stage takes longer.

Touching the apple now I poke it with my finger (PATENT), and find it is hard and may not change form much more.

The shrunken head of glorious fruit now wrinkled and without any moisture could have been moved ages ago but I have been far too busy this year (PATENT).

The rotten apple has become a symbol of several projects that have been launched in the last year that have been building over time (PATENT).

It is time to move that apple away from my desk and start again (PATENT).
Though never an original idea the time lapse photography project was fun to do and I imagine doing another very soon.

I want to know how other things rot, and will explore new photography projects.

In padding this little talk about APPLE, I need to take you to the SINGULARITY SUMMIT 2011.

It has been seven weeks (PATENT) since the 2011 Melbourne Singularity Summit ended National Science Week and though given my $130 complimentary tickets (PATENT) to review the conference I have been doing so many things on computers that failed to write it up (PATENT).


I attended Saturday afternoon of the important summit, seated away from others and took notes about important things I picked up from several talks. Not to ruin any worldwide lectures of the Singularity Summits with too much review content that retells the plot, let me construct this review in a simple numbered list form (PATENT).

1. I was happy to chat with a new Melbourne artist, 2 wine appreciating friends, a music industry contact who I had interviewed for a recent history documentary, all at this event and had my photo taken amongst important guests.

2. My mistake to take the seat (PATENT) of one regular Summit punter caused some confusion amongst the lecture theatre order at the breaking of a kind of social understanding unknown to me from my several universities.

3. Many futurists use models of ‘bees’ and ‘ants’ to discuss how computers are programmed and send information which interested me greatly being a queen bee with my own drones and hive (PATENT).

I also like movies about bees and ants, and these models helped my simple Arts mind to focus on understanding the computer science lectures.

It is my recommendation that they use more references about bees and ants (PATENT) throughout the entire lectures to retain my interest or that of those outside the technology industries.

4. Most lecturers at the Singularity Summits use Powerpoint presentations as they travel around the world, though in this program they spend little time on the graphic design of pages which is very disappointing. Though their knowledge of computers is amazing it is from a programmer rather than designer background and we all know that though they are cleverer in making animation and websites work using HTML + BASIC they cant design people much better than stick figures and that is why some computer programs General User Interface comes out looking so boring that only geeks like it.

I was largely disappointed by all powerpoint presentations, and think that all experts should use their computer more wisely to create an amazing presentation that shows the worldwide stage that they know what they are talking about (PATENT).

I know that current high school students produce better Powerpoint than these worldwide computer experts. So they should go back home and spend a little time on making themselves look better for the next Summit.

Within their pages there was a lot of tacky graphic images added to the Powerpoints information that were pathetic in their general meaning, broke copyright laws by their inclusion and failed to give correct photo and artist credits.

Most Powerpoints showed error in page design, sometimes spelling, were wrongly spaced and for me distracted from the concept that we were discussing the future of computing.

That said I was impressed with the local electronics lecturer Ray Jarvis who had designed a nice Powerpoint to go with his presentation “The envy of Roboticists – AI Operating in the Material World” that contained nice fonts, locally produced photos and good spacing.

5. Artificial Intelligence is not going to be around for at least 20 years. Robots still look rather basic like 1980s toys and characters found in movies since the 1960s, though I thought that technology was far more advanced, there is still a long way to go.

6. They reckon that we will have service robots doing a lot of human jobs by 2020.

7. Someone reminded us that Steve Jobs was sick and would probably resign from Apple.

My concept of the standard of Robotics was based on those found in science fiction films since my birth, and strangely characters such as C3P0 from Star Wars are still a long way back in the future.

PUNK PADDING – The Apple that died.

I will take up now where TOM WOLFE left us in the 2000 HOOKING UP story about SILICON VALLEY ‘The Two Young Men Who Went West’ that was first published in Esquire 1983 as ‘The Tinkerings of Robert Noyce’, and ask you to consider the advances in technology since my birth over thirty years ago that coincided with the start of the APPLE COMPUTER company.

Consider Apple computers, your first computer, computer games, calculators, adding machines, BASIC, HTML, first generation websites, third generation interactions and the return of WEB 2.0 this century.

Take a square picture from your family album and upload it to your facebook.
Then use your digital camera to take tens of thousands more photos and you will have thought about a rough history of APPLE and ALICIA BEE over the years (PATENT).

In honor of the death of Steve Jobs, I thought about my dead apple and choose to make this blog the most forward imagining look at the future of MISS PIGGY JOURNALIST (PATENT).

DISCLAIMER : The concept of the ALICIA BEE + 1 or PLUS ONE is nothing but a thought of the FUTURE of NEW JOURNALISM and the MISS PIGGY JOURNALIST in the computer blog age.

Miss Piggy talks about playing herself in ‘Muppets In Space’.

PROJECTING FUTURE PRODUCT –  Designing The Alicia Bee + 1

Perhaps the most exciting single thing that I thought about during the Singularity Summit 2011 was the concept of a cloned ALICIA BEE robot (PATENT) that would take over future music cities and help me to do my job on an international level.

I could review several gigs at once, all over the world using the limited vocabulary of my own descriptive passages (PATENT). The robot would be programmed to write MISS PIGGY JOURNALIST (PATENT) style articles without me even working, which leaves more ME time for shopping, holidaying, taking photos and poetry.

I imagined the first designs for the ALICIA BEE + 1 (PATENT) or simply the AB + 1 (PATENT) as being quite plainly a boxed like NED KELLY robot with DOLL PARTS, RED HAIR and a RANGE OF AMAZING OUTFITS.

1. NED KELLY DESIGN (PATENT)- Due to the limited technology of the world most robots these days are still quite square, something like what Ned Kelly had fashioned over 130 years ago.
I like that this design would give a recognizable symbol of rebellion, and Australian folk hero status.

In choosing the letterbox slit on the helmet design I hope that my robot would be accepted all around the world including Muslim countries where it can work as a journalist while respecting the local laws for not showing its female face though only of artificial mechanical life.

This is also inspired by the BAGISM of John and Yoko who believed that putting a bag over their face would show a message about what is important to the media and how we communicate with one another (refer any discussion of ‘What is Bagism’ to the “WebChat” here.

Perhaps the symbol of lifting the KELLY BAGISM (PATENT) helmet from all AB + 1 robots will be the strongest image of changing social times and the feminism of the future.

Note: I joke here to draw parallels to the famous Hermes Kelly Bag, a style by the brand that was coined after Grace Kelly who had become Princess Monaco held the Sac à dépêches bag in front of her pregnant belly in a 1956 photo in LIFE MAGAZINE. When the public began calling it the “Kelly” bag the name was adopted by Hermès, and the bag became popular. All robots should have distinct recognisable design of a princess and designer fashion elite aswell as peace campaigner.

Please note that though there is a helmet design at the front the robot will have long hair at the back and a fringe at the top similar to my trademark cut.

2. DOLL PARTS (PATENT)- Saying that the ALICIA BEE PLUS ONE should have really long eyelashes (PATENT) around its eyes that you can connect with through the letterbox slit area, similar to children’s doll parts that illustrate the unique features of my own character while still hiding behind the square helmet.
Think the maximum mascara lash extention from a week of makeup (PATENT), and you will recognize the eyes of this special communication feature on our robot model.

The makeup eyelashes above is done by Nefertara makeup;

This doll here is found online by the artist Yuri who takes photos of dolls. Check her out at; 

3. RED HAIR (PATENT) – The hair is really important because everyone knows me from my hair, and no one else has the color like mine therefore the ALICIA BEE robot should be recognizable by beautiful hair. Though never before has any dye company been able recreate the unique hues of my red hair (PATENT), the future could still bottle such a mixture of strawberry blonde but they will call it ALICIA BEE after it is perfected for my robot. Any robot made in my honor should have long red hair (PATENT), which is wavy in my style and human like rather than synthetic (PATENT), instantly recognizable to people around the world as ALICIA BEE hair. People should say, that “AB +1 has really good hair”, or “you know that’s an AB+1 because of the natural hair, just look at it”.

4. RANGE OF AMAZING OUTFITS (PATENT) – Most computer programs and robots have a limited amount of possible outfits to be worn, though the ALICIA BEE PLUS ONE has what is renown as the most choices for clothing available for a robot model (PATENT) in history and that is another of its unique assets on the futuristic horizon. Creating possible outfits from a really extensive wardrobe programme (PATENT) of thousands of clothing items means that on any occasion worldwide all ALICIA BEE Plus One robots would never be wearing the same thing; though always in style. Unique personality can be given in color combinations and accessories.
I cant wait to see the AB+1 upload all those photos from the best music locations around the world.
When the ALICIA BEE PLUS ONE becomes available book the AB +1 to review a gig near you or interview someone.

NOTE: This is a (PATENT) (2011) design for a personal robot and any online geek that thinks I am underground and may be ripped off should not create their own ALICIA BEE + 1 in my design.
For those that think that this is a message for the afterworld of robot designers to create such a model close to my description they would be wrong.

ALICIA BEE and MISS PIGGY JOURNALIST do not want any companies to make a robot in her honor, unless, of course, we come to a commercial agreement.

POPULAR MUSIC – Elephant Eyes : I Want to Know SINGLE

I Want To Know is about the burning life questions of a young world that is turning. For Elephant Eyes the important dilemmas always relate back to love.

Placed in a silver card envelope in a single full of sweet pretty singing parts this one track given to punters free is a taster or a band who should play in town more often. Listening to her, the main female vocalist asks you to take a peak inside their Ballarat de ville story, where already our hearts have been won from the names like The Mavis’. This is their male female vocal song that could come closest to sounding like The Mavis’.

Awkward timing changes reflect decisions made in rehearsal rooms that everyone has made before (PATENT). Elephant Eyes are just about ready to understand another recording studio and working out where all the music parts meet their unique singing style. Quiet snare and bassline accompany the vocal driven song.

They are paddock green grass that is this century (PATENT), so they didn’t know their ‘Lies, Lies Lies’ repetition reminds, reminds, reminds the oldies eyes that Dallas Crane Lent ‘Mr Meddle’ from Pink Floyd when he borrowed the album from me and Jonco in Shit Creek in just another B-hometown (PATENT).

I listened to this band because they have a song that mentions Ballarat as an old Gold town. Look out for more jazz in their live set.


SKIPPING GIRLS VINEGAR is sending a monkey into space with an MP3 player of their music and messages from their fans. The monkey will rocket up to 132 000 feet, then who really knows what happens that high in the sky.

They ask you to leave a message on their Facebook  fan page.

My message to the universe is;




Skipping Girl Vinegar launch a new single tomorrow night at the Northcote Social Club, while they play at many other venues.

THE CHASE THE SUN – Single Launch Tour Oct/Nov 2011

With Myles Mayo and The Trouble With Templeton
301 High Street Northcote VIC 3070

Friday, 21st Oct – VANGUARD- NSW
With Myles Mayo and The Trouble With Templeton
42 King St, Newtown NSW 2042

Thursday, 3rd Nov – GOLD COAST ARTS CENTRE – QLD
With special guests Jac Stone & Ishtar 
135 Bundall Rd, Surfers Paradise, QLD 4217

Friday, 4th Nov – JOE’S WATERHOLE – QLD
With Myles Mayo and The Trouble With Templeton
Memorial Drive, Eumundi, 4562

Saturday, 5th Nov – BEETLE BAR – QLD
With Myles Mayo and The Trouble With Templeton

Friday, 11th Nov – FRESH – TAS
With Special Guest and The Trouble With Templeton

Saturday, 12th Nov – REPUBLIC BAR – TAS 
With Special Guest and The Trouble With Templeton



Melbourne’s Aleks and the Ramps release a new digital single; Middle Aged Unicorn on Beach with Sunset on October 27th through Gaga Digital.

Middle Aged Unicorn on Beach with Sunset is the first computer listening of Aleks and the Ramps’ forthcoming album due for release next year.

They also re-release their first two albums; Pisces vs Aquarius (2007) and Midnight Believer (2009).

Aleks and the Ramps launch single 
Middle Aged Unicorn on Beach with Sunset in :

on Thursday 10 November
at Buffalo Club.

on Friday 11 November
at The Gate.

And then they play again in SYDNEY
on Sunday 13 November
at the Newtown Festival.


The dead (PATENT) Steve Jobs still has an amazing 313 patents to his name, while Bill Gates only has 9 in his life so far.

The New York Times listed a good description of the patents that range from different computer parts and casings, to phones, power and plug adapters and different media players.

As inspiring as that is I rushed around and patented everything that is original about this blog for an issue special and didn’t come close to his total, but then was only working for a day in the whole of the past 35 years at itemizing my inventions.

Some ALICIA BEE inventions of the past 30 years include;

Dress over pants (PATENT) (1979)

Hot pink and purple (PATENT) (1984)

Hot pink and black (PATENT) (1985)

Hair ponytail half up and down (PATENT) (1989)

Mascara without eyeliner (PATENT) (1990)

Stussys worn by a girl (PATENT) (1990)

Travelling To The City for parties (PATENT) (1990)

Not dying hair ever (PATENT) (1990)

The First Muse (PATENT) (1991)

The creative response essay (PATENT) (1991)

Travelling To The City for parties and returning for morning school (PATENT) (1991)

Modeling when not considered beautiful (PATENT) (1991)

Correspondence VCE learning when younger (PATENT) (1992)

Not Wearing The Same Outfit All Year (PATENT) (1993)

Making Surreal Films That Don’t Make Sense and have a long soundtrack (PATENT) (1994)

Vans shoes at gigs in Melbourne not Converse (PATENT) (1994)

Repeating the photographic negative in reverse (PATENT) (1994)

The handmade Chinese Checkers Table (PATENT) (1995)

The handmade ‘Love Heart’ table (PATENT) (1995)

Handsewn Couch Covers (PATENT) (1995)

Black Boys in a vase (PATENT) (1995)

Taking Domestic Photos and presenting them as art (PATENT) (1996)

Using old photography paper (PATENT) (1996)

Out of focus photography (PATENT) (1996)

Doing all universities classes in One Day and Working Full Time (1997)

The Alicia special pasta (PATENT) (1998)

The Alicia Pizza (PATENT) (1998)

The Alicia Flavoured Damper (PATENT) (2001)

The unique film review style (PATENT) (2001)

Australian Souvenir and History Décor (PATENT) (2001)

The Superior Magazine Style Community Radio show (PATENT) (2001)

The Alicia Roo Bolognese (PATENT) (2002)

Gumboots at a Music Festival (PATENT)(2002)

‘Good Stuff’ phrase (PATENT) (2002)

Being a Music Journalist at Journalism School (2002)

‘Cool Buddhism’ religion (PATENT) (2003)

Growing Hair To Be A Mermaid (PATENT) (2003)

Travelling to Every Music Festival in Two States in the one year (PATENT) (2003)

Dissing the ARIAs (PATENT) (2003)

Becoming Immortal (PATENT) (2004)

Dissing Rolling Stone (PATENT) (2004)

Waisted Belt trend (PATENT) (2004)

‘Good Folk Club’ music event (PATENT) (2004)

‘Goodstock’ music magazine (PATENT) (2004)

Printing large A1 Music Poster in Black and White (PATENT) (2005)

‘Good Country Club’ music event (PATENT) (2005)

‘Highway 31 Revisited’ music event (PATENT) (2005)

Bubble machine at all events (PATENT) (2005)

Eating of Too Much Paneer Meals (PATENT) (2006)

‘Every Good Girl Deserves Fruit’ music event (PATENT) (2006)

‘The Good Booking Agency’ music booking agency (PATENT) (2006)

The new Miso Soup (PATENT) (2007)

‘The Good Wine Club’ (PATENT) (2007)

‘The Good Folk Song Competition’ (PATENT) (2007)

Taking Too Many Photos of Self Portraits for Facebook (PATENT) (2009)

‘Bathers On The Beach’ book (PATENT) (2010)

‘Grey Hair’ photos (PATENT) (2011)

‘The Book Of The Dead And Wounded’ book (PATENT) (2011)

The long list of patents could go on and on as so much is forgotten and I cant waste anymore time on this in the middle of the day, but you should just remember that ALICIA BEE is an INVENTOR not a copy cat and that though trends repeat; she is often the only one who does them first in her town and city in the world.


Written after the death of Steve Jobs (PATENT)

Processing The Information (PATENT)

Alicia Bee

Basic logic tells us all to shutdown,

And turn the computer off for a while,

Electric train breath makes a sleepy sound,

(You should) Leave time to process the information.

Make your own statement to the internet,

He had typed it all out in a word document,

(Just because) Someone died, you don’t need to get upset.

Smiley faces turn other check to frown,

The machine listens to each command sent,

(The) Technology is always going to be around,

(They) Switch technology off in the house,

(You should) Leave time to process the information.